Some people:
What did you do when you breakup with Paul Crispin??
Me:
On the first breakup, I seriously prayed bcoz I was very sad..it was a misunderstanding..I did not replied his SMS..funny, right? But that's the truth..bcoz not replying SMS, he assumed that I was not serious with him..After few days, I started my jogging regime & he got to know about it..I was ignoring him until he agreed to come back..
On second breakup, I semi fainted at workplace..seriously I could not accept his excuses..I went to clinic after Harlem fetched me from work..Doctor asked him,"Did you both fight before coming here?"..of coz Harlem shook his head..he's not the culprit! The doctor commented,"She's very stressed..She needs some rest..I will prescribed sleeping pills for her..Let her rest..You don't disturb her emotion, ok?!"..
After Harlem paid the medicine, he send me home..tucked me in bed..waited by my side until I fall asleep..My mom did asked him what's wrong with me..His reply,"She broke up with her boyfriend"..My mom responded,"And you are OK with her having other boyfriend?"..His reply,"Auntie, I cannot give her a marriage so, I cannot stop her from searching for someone who can gives her that..but I will not leave her again until she's officially married in front of my face..That's my promise when she accepted me again in 1996.."..
After that second breakup, I've no more real & full happiness in life..everything changed to be meaningless..No matter how much I am seen laughing, not many know how unhappy that laughter actually is..I've stop dating new men seriously..If I was not meeting Harlem, I was meeting Zulkifli..Only these 2 men who were there to accompany me during those period..
People around me persuaded me to move on..which I believe I did moved on..only I'm no longer wish to be anyone's girlfriend anymore..I always give many great demands each time someone requested more than friendship..when the truth is - I no longer need a man..I'm tired of giving men the chances to play me out..I'm exhausted to keep on listening to empty promises made by men around me..
Each time a man smiled at me, I could as if see a sign on his forehead "DANGER..KEEP OUT.."..Yes! Seemed unfair but I'm fobia with men who expect more than friendship from me..in my heart always said,"Here we go again..I love you..I really love you..Yawn..Yawn..Just words..No action..Gonna waste my time again & again..So long..Bye Bye.."..
Some people:
Some men are for real, you know???
Me:
Make sure he can outbeat who Paul Crispin is..Then, I might consider..😁 😁 😁.. I was joking..I don't need a man to love me..I just need all men to stay away..far away from me..I just wanna lead the life I've dreamt all my life all over again..Life full of freedom! The existence of a boyfriend or partner will only limits my freedom in life..I'm no longer love the idea of reporting my whereabouts to any men..I'm not interested to explain myself what the needs to meet my girlfriends to any men..I'm not into spending my weekends with any men..I've done that all & I see nothing great coming out from it..I need more "ME" time nowadays..I'm looking forward to travel around the world rather than wasting my time with any men who truly not worth having..I'm tired of chasing & being chased by shadows..I'm setting myself free from the hassle of having a man whom I cannot trust..Just leave me alone..I will be just FINE!!! I promise!!!!
