I have noticed that many teens out there are worrying sick bcoz of who they are..worst when their bodies are bigger than those around them..many compared themselves with those photoshopped pictures of models in front of those glamourous magazines..Many also being bullied by others who are stereotyping or judgmental or just plain anti-FAT people..Many teens were reported committing suicide just bcoz they were victims of bullies especially on internet due to this cause.
I can understand how those teens who died due to people around them being too judgmental or stereotyping or just plain anti-FAT..bcoz I have faced many discriminations thru'out my life being BIGGER (UK size 16/18) than the standard petite Asian figure/body of UK size 0-6..being the less pretty one in the family..being the average student thru'out my schooldays..except during my days in Architectural Designing school where I started to excel in my studies..hehehehehehe..
My story...
I was once desperately in need to be skinny after I completed my high school education..really desperate until I was willing to pop in slimming pills prescribed by my family's doctor..stop eating rice and other great foods..only surviving on plain water daily..eating 1 meal per day..for 2 years..Running on track becomes my pastime favourite..indeed..I managed to lost 40kg (out of 89kg) within 2 years..Yes! I was excited to be skinny back then bcoz my whole life before that, I was never skinny..or be considered skinny..I bought alot of new clothes when I lost weights..went on dating spree..got alot of attentions from the men..some women even hated me bcoz I always outshine them at some occasions..deeeeeeeerrrrrrrr..JEALOUS!
I was happy for awhile to have what I wished for but I was not fully happy bcoz being skinny is just NOT ME! I began to hate some hypocrites around me..when condemns of the past became praises at present..I also confused about who are really my friends and who are there just bcoz I was attracting alot of men's attentions and they wanted to be around me when those men approaching sexily..So, it was like living a fantasy which soon faded on me..
As I gained back all my weights when I stopped my running..popping slimming pills..starving myself to anorexia..Indeed I found myself losing more and more friends..until I ended up with only 6 friends..In Singapore - there are my ex-Harlem, Lynn and Ree Nee..whereas in USA, I have Bill and Tim..In France, there is Xavier who I see as my brother..ahakz..When I recalled my past, I actually have more than 500 friends back them..WHERE ARE THEY NOW??? I have no answer..I just let it be..So be it (That's Paul Crispin's favourite phrase..LOL..)..
Yes! When some people commented about my current figure, I did felt like punching hard on their bloody faces..but I never did bcoz..WHATEVER FOR??? I shouldn't entertain such behaviour..I can either take action and be blamed for it or walk away and just live my life at the fullest..Whether I am fat or skinny, it is always been my choice..As long as I am healthy, who are those people to question or discriminate me..I am only human..If some people condemning my figure to be the cause of me being not married - like they said,"Who is going to marry a FAT lady??"..that's their deadly mistake..bcoz even when I am in this current body, some men did approached me in public..Don't play-play..I am still worthy of someone's love..which right now - I prefer loving myself rather than wasting my time loving a man who never stays...Hmmmm..but Harlem stays..how??? Hehehehehehehe..Harlem does not have the word "BREAK UP" in his vocabulary..whoahahahahaha..also, that American William not leaving...Hey! I am FAT..but these men LOVE me as who I am..plus my FATS..
To all teens out there..Defend yourself always from being mocked by those bullies..whether you are FAT, TOO FAT, SKINNY, TOO SKINNY, PRETTY, TOO PRETTY..Remember that you are worthy..Not all humans can like/love you..Heck care..Just learn to love yourself..Stay healthy no matter what shape/size your body is..No one can loves you like you are loving yourself..
Signing off..
Shasha De William..
I am Asian..my surname is American and belongs to my pal..hehehehehehe..
*Yes! I have dated international men..from white Caucasian to African American..Yes! In this current figure of size UK16/18..I just too busy right now to go on dating spree..Excuses..Excuses..hehehehehe..*
Less than 2 weeks before Christmas..yabadabadooooooooooooo
